What is being lost in the Imus flack

What has been lost in the Imus discussion that we are collectively involved in now, is how well these women from the Rutgers basketball team are, in fact, not "nappy headed hos", but thoughtful, accomplished, beautiful young women.

If you think what Imus said was shocking. I've heard much worse said to my face over the years and have been treated with even more disdain. It's like roaches in a building: if you see one on the top floor, all the floors beneath are infested. By the time you've noticed Imus speaking this way, the rest of society has been totally corrupted for a long time. It seems no matter how well we as black women do, how much we achieve, or what we are able to do, we are always pulled back to be "put in our collective place."

Civilization is not acting civilly. The whole notion that this bad language began with rap groups is nonsense. This language began on white plantations. Rap music initially began as a means to "fight the power". The white music companies decided that was too hot to make that warrior cry, so why not attack and degrade groups that essentially can't fight back, namely: black women and gays.

Black women are the easy target since no on listens to us anyway. It's something that we have to continue to live with. What is so hurtful about this is we are supposedly living in a country of freedom and equality. I can attest that these attributes are not here. As an Immigrant, I was lead to believe that you can do and be anything you want to here. It’s not until a few really bad things happen that you understand the truth. That lesson, for me, has been long and drawn out. Black Americans already know, so sometimes they don't even bother trying.

But in all of this we can't forget that the Rutgers basketball team does exist. We have made some strides forward. It's just been a very painful walk.

I hope we that we all learned that "words matter". But I fear not. This kind of language and behavior will just go underground and find new ways of reaching its target audience because there is, after all, a real market for this stuff. Never fear, Imus and his cohorts will be back to disrespect black women again. But I think that we have also learned that this society does have lines and eventually we get a bellyful of this garbage and don't want to eat anymore. This society can change -- albeit very, very slowly.